I just received a call from my wife to tell me about a job opening. She was kind of rushed, but covered the specifics thoroughly enough and needed me to accept right then and there.
The offer seemed decent - free food and drink as well as a uniform. Alas, I had to decline to be Santa for a Day at an embassy Christmas party. No, winter coats, baggy pants, tall boots and hats just aren't my style in the middle of the day. Besides, it would be such a disappointment to see Santa wiping sweat from his brow with his fake beard and fighting off the early symptoms of heat stroke. Sorry for that visual. Sorry to decline.
"What about that first real job offer," you ask. Ah, that is story for another day.